| my life is beautifully incomplete, |
[Feb. 6th, 2010|04:13 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  lethargic | ] |
I'm genuinely happy without a doubt. Maybe occasionally, I would feel a little down when I couldn't perform during training or game, unable to finish my assignments, got a really bad grade for a particular module, reminded of the fact that I'm not a PE teacher, argued or quarreled with the people close to my heart or many other daily affairs but that negative emotion only got to stay for the shortest while you can imagine. How long can anyone tolerate the haunting of sadness? The worst I had was spending a day mourning over failing my PPT last year. Otherwise, I can't recall any major incident that got me distorted and broken. Anyway, a seemingly emotional quote on facebook or blog is probably posted because I wanted to share with the world those beautiful quotes that I've fallen in love with.
I am dying to learn something new, probably a new sports or guitar soon! There are so many things to buy, guitar, instax, turf shoes and new handphone (I dropped my hp a million times). No money!
I was browsing through facebook, looking through all the photos I've taken ever since I entered NIE. One and a half semester passed by, university life has been a wheel of fortune spin because you never know what's coming next. The best takeaway would be knowing my awesome 1C, the NTU floorball team and my lovely minahs gang. =) |
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| i've lost my ability to write. |
[Feb. 5th, 2010|03:18 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
I'll make long stories shorter with short sentences to write a not so long entry.
Wednesday:
I went to URA to collect the information I need for the discussion forum for Geography and went around that area to snap photos. After that, I headed down to the clinic to face my greatest fear. The tooth is finally done, not without drinking my own blood the entire day. Despite the pain and blood, I met the girls and watched APAC. We spent the entire night drooling over the Korea's coach and player No.6. Feeling fat, I went for a run at about 2.30am, concussed on the floor without showering and only woke up at 5am to clean myself up.
Thursday:
As predicted, I was late for class and suffered an aching body due to the lack of regular runs these days. After class, went to play basketball and was constantly in fear when playing against Jeff. I was grateful that I walked out of the court without any part of me injured. After basketball, we headed to gym and I was repeatedly abused by Jemmo and Joel. They picked me up and threw me onto the mat, stuff me inside the barrel and rolled me around.
Friday:
Soccer and I can't wait! I think I'll stay in hall after that and start rushing all the assignments before it's too late! But I miss Mummy's food. Hai.
My ugly toe nails that refused to grow.
Blur is beautiful.
Awesome weather that day, I should have brought my Holga too!
The RED DOT MUSEUM.
Do you know?
Check out number 13! My ultimate idol!
The real reason why we were all there!
*Wipe drool*
Don't you grow weary of pretending that you're happy even though deep down within yourself, you know that those laughter are merely superficial acts to smother your true emotion? That's not being strong, that's just being a coward who doesn't dare to face her weakling self. Maybe you can be weak but you can only afford a day or two. I'll hide myself underneath my blanket, cry the loudest I can for the entire night and wake up the next day with a brand new self with sadness all gone. Every single day I'm surrounded by happiness, doing everything I could to make the best out of life. I don't see a reason why you can't. You only lost someone and it can't be worse than losing yourself. So don't, prove to everyone that you're capable of picking yourself up. |
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| I'm staying at livejournal |
[Feb. 2nd, 2010|02:09 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  grateful | ] |
The 4th week and the 4th time I skipped Monday's lectures, I'm hopeless already. I shall give 5th week a try though Jemmo would probably bet his whole fortune that I won't go but I'll try! I can't wait for all the trainings to begin before I die of boredom. Met the girlfriends at Orchard for dinner and the usual catch up session. Another shot gun marriage from one of our secondary friends, seem like the usual news I always hear and the usual 'I don't understand what the hell were they thinking' would shoot incessantly like bullets from my mouth. Irresponsible people, you can't even take care of yourselves, let alone taking care of the kids. Seriously wtf.
And I'll be seeing the real you real soon! =) |
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| you're never gonna be mine. |
[Jan. 30th, 2010|11:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crushed | ] |
 '
"So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."
From Tuesday With Morrie.
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 30th, 2010|04:24 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sad | ] |
Running makes me less unhappy. (But the shoes are in hall. =.=''') |
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| awesome meepok supper |
[Jan. 27th, 2010|03:46 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | cheerful | ] |
We picked our feet and strolled along the dimly lit street of nanyang drive, looked up the starry sky and admired the sparkling beauties. There's nothing better than having the company of your best friend at the wee hour of a lonely night, talking about almost everything of anything. I love Ghui like how a bee loves its honey. <3
I secretly wish that Leon doesn't return Singapore so soon, otherwise Ghui wouldn't be this nice to meet me. Oops. =/ |
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| joshbeech + colemohr = fuckinglicious hot! |
[Jan. 26th, 2010|07:17 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cold | ] |
I think fucky ng posted this before but I didn't take a closer look into those skinny boys. Something peculiar is taking place within me, I've a sudden thirst for skinny boys, how wrong can that sound but anyway, they're fuckinglicious hot please!
Booked the appointment with the tattoo artist, like finally! I was so busy with checking the translation for my verse and booking the appointment, I was totally inattentive in class. Assignments due in 2-3 weeks time and I don't even know what is there to complete. That's truly awesome, right. =.='''' |
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| team NTU <3 |
[Jan. 25th, 2010|12:53 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  excited | ] |
There are teams that lost, couldn't make it to semis or finals but as cliche as it may sound, I believe that every team is a champion. A team that trained hard together, fought hard together, stood by one another throughout the ups and downs of a game are true winners. Position or medals are just bonus to recognizing a team's effort. To those who couldn't make it through the semis or finals, don't be disheartened. To my SIM friends and RP juniors, in my heart, you are already a champion.
Bin was right about it all along that I'll feel more attached to the team during the IVP season. For the goals I've conceded, the mistakes I've made, my girls never blamed me and instead they encouraged me and stood by me. I'm glad that I did not quit the team, if not I'll never experience such wonderful team spirit. Let's play our hearts out and get it tonight! =) |
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| starts all over again |
[Jan. 23rd, 2010|12:05 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  dirty | ] |
"Everyone has people in their lives that are gay, lesbian or transgender or bisexual. They may not want to admit it, but I guarantee they know somebody."
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| nothing for saddening thoughts |
[Jan. 22nd, 2010|05:52 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | cold | ] |
I was talking to Melissa about personal perspective towards relationships and she couldn't agree more. Some people spend an overwhelming of emotions, energy and time on unnecessarily negative aspects of relationship instead of learning from it and moving on to a better venue of love. I thought to myself, there's not another day I would waste thinking about how pathetically heartbroken I am because such behavior doesn't help curing anything. Put those behind, nothing is more important than living the life I love dearly.
Last two games (towards finals, I'm very certain.) to go before marking the end of IVP. I can't deny the disappointments I have for not being able to play most of the games because of incapability but I'll not stop. I'll climb higher and come back stronger because I'm better than that. Train harder, play harder and that's all that matter. (I wish to put in study harder but ermmm.... hai)
Catch all my loves at RP! Tiong is gonna strangle me if I'm late AGAIN for the bus! |
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| not for me |
[Jan. 22nd, 2010|03:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | full | ] |
"Lizzie! I never thought before, that there was a woman in the world who could affect me so much by saying so little. But don't be hard in your construction of me. You don't know what my state of mind towards you is. You don't know how you haunt me and bewilder me. You don't know how the cursed carelessness that is over-officious in helping me at every other turning of my life, won't help me here. You have struck it dead, I think, and I sometimes almost wish you had struck me dead along with it." |
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| ex-roommate and current illegal occupant, miss woo |
[Jan. 20th, 2010|02:18 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | cold | ] |
As I shivered in cold in the room, stupid kf is lying comfortably in my bed and cuddling herself in my blanket. Her visit was not a pleasant one. She won eight dollars from me, ate my beef maggi, ordered me to switch on the aircon and is now occupying my bed. I'm gonna kill her tonight! |
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| tuesday, another day |
[Jan. 19th, 2010|01:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sad | ] |
I woke up in reluctance, feeling mundane as I stared blankly at the clock, mentally forcing myself to get up for a wash and headed to school. The room was covered in semi-darkness, occasionally having rays of light peeping into the room as the curtains flipped open gently. I showered and packed in a hasty rush, ran off to school before I am late again.
The usually effortless pathway seemed tedious. The lengthy journey had me walking slower, my feet felt heavy, every step was a dread as I began to have thoughts of refusing school. My perseverance and determination began to crease. I was doubtful about coaxing myself into studying something out of my interest zone for another one and a half year.
I thought they made me feel better, I thought we were a family but it had always been my one sided affair, they are themselves while I am just another outsider. The appetite to eat was gone, occupied was a rush of solemn as reality hit me hard. I picked up my feet, quickly escaped from the scene before tears roll.
I learn nothing about Geography now, I am constantly haunted by the words said to me. I was sad, now I am sadder then ever.
I've made up my mind and you really can't do anything. Only guilt is left, I'm really sorry. |
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| when love comes, you can't stop |
[Jan. 16th, 2010|04:05 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | thankful | ] |
When I fall in love I take my time
There's no need to hurry when I'm making up my mind
You can turn off the sun but I'm still gonna shine and I'll tell you why
Maybe....... |
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| some sort of good luck charm |
[Jan. 15th, 2010|12:58 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  busy | ] |
Favourite from Invictus, President Nelson Mandela said, "I thank whatever gods may be. For my unconquerable soul. I am the master of my fate. I am the captain of my soul."
These few days had been a heart storm for me, a violent wave of emotions mercilessly splashed into my troubled mind and had me stained my damped cheeks over and over again. I almost failed myself but thankfully I didn't. Anyone could give up on me but never myself. I'll persevere and never stop, I love myself, my dreams and floorball. There's never a limit to my best, cause' I'm just gonna keep getting better.
Some sort of lucky charm, clean sheet all the way. To prove, I can do it.
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| polaroid |
[Jan. 13th, 2010|12:13 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  blah | ] |
"Cherish all your happy moments; they make a fine cushion for old age." |
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| fours |
[Jan. 12th, 2010|04:15 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bored | ] |
It has been four years. What exactly have I achieved?
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| nothing matters no more |
[Jan. 12th, 2010|01:43 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | optimistic | ] |
"Forget past mistakes. Forget failures. Forget everything except what you're going to do now, and do it."
William James Durant
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| An empty page: A brand new start |
[Jan. 11th, 2010|02:51 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | happy | ] |
There's too much to do on the last day of holiday and the beginning of semester two had me skipped two lectures, not exactly a good start to begin with. Somehow, very impulsive decision to delete all the entries I had in 2009. Forget about how it dawned, remember how it rises.
It was awkwardness at its extreme when Wannie was with us for dinner after training on Saturday. Not that I don't want to forgive her but sadly, I just can't bring myself to forgive her. Someone whom I've known for years, cared so much, deserted me when I was awfully drunk and stole my iphone. Impossible, never can I forgive and forget. Worst, she's with someone close to Oreo's group. Not like having M there is worst enough.
"Social studies is a schizophrenic bastard child." But the people in this class, a wholesale of awesomeness!
My baby takes awesome photos and hopefully, the holga is not going to be too bad.
I'm not paying any attention in class. IVP later, go NTU! =) |
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